Woman backed for calling off wedding after fiance’s shocking “gift”

A post online has ignited debate about how important good intentions are when it comes to big mistakes.

On Reddit, a bride-to-be was widely supported after revealing she called off her wedding following her fiance’s controversial “gift”—a surprise purchase of a fixer-upper house—without her input. The post has gone viral, receiving 17,000 upvotes, with many condemning the fiancé’s gift as inappropriate. Newsweek reached out to u/Big_Owl_9918 for comment via Reddit.

The original poster said in the post that her fiance, Mark, shared the surprise during a pre-wedding celebration with friends. What she initially believed to be a sweet gesture turned out to be the key to a house Mark had bought. The catch? The property needed extensive renovations—something the poster had never agreed to or even discussed with Mark.

“I was taken aback because I had no idea he was even looking for real estate,” she wrote. “My first reaction was one of shock and confusion, as I thought it was a huge decision that we should have discussed together. As I processed the moment, I realized the house wasn’t just any house—it was a fixer-upper on the outskirts of town … I felt blindsided.”

When the poster expressed her disappointment, Mark defended his actions, calling the surprise a way to begin their lives together. But, unable to see past the breach of trust, the woman called off the wedding, shocking the couple’s friends and leaving Mark upset.

Online, commenters overwhelmingly backed the poster.

“Mark made a life-altering decision without talking to you at all. You were right to feel blindsided and crushed,” u/No_Beyond_1995 wrote. “The foundation of a solid marriage isn’t love, it’s open communication.”

Another commenter, u/Illustrious_Bird9234, pointed out the implications of Mark’s so-called gift: “Not only is it a surprise house, it’s a surprise fixer-upper. That’s not even a gift—that’s a job.”

“Never stay with somebody who is willing to do whatever they want without consulting you. It doesn’t work out, and you will always resent them,” u/chefrachhh commented.

An Expert Opinion

Newsweek spoke to Dr. Michael Kane, chief medical officer at the Indiana Center for Recovery, who emphasized the psychological implications of Mark’s actions in a relationship.

“Making major financial decisions without consulting your partner can feel like a breach of trust,” Kane said. “It’s not just about the finances—it’s about time, energy, and emotional investment.”

Kane said that the incident could be reflective of deeper issues: “When one partner consistently makes decisions without input from the other, it creates an imbalance,” he added. “It’s crucial for couples to align expectations and develop strategies for making decisions together.”

Ultimately, he encouraged the woman to evaluate whether Mark is willing to address the underlying problems, and to go from there.

“A sincere apology and a commitment to improving communication could indicate the relationship is worth repairing,” Kane said. “On the other hand, if he continues to dismiss her feelings or fails to recognize the importance of partnership, it might be an indication that they are fundamentally misaligned in how they view collaboration and respect in a relationship.”

For the poster, it is clear that the issue went far beyond the surprise house. It was a matter of trust, respect and partnership—as Kane said—and these were qualities she ultimately decided were missing.